I detest the recurring reminders

The choke of reality

Of that exclusive existence

beyond these holiday walls

It scratches my throat

Like a ‘jagged little pill’

I beg it to stop - this torture

and it is seeping into my veins like a poison

taking hold of my body, my mind

My stomach feels sick

And the hairs on my arms are on end

The cloak of melancholy

drips heavy and

I am fatigued

As the one visited

but with whom you never stay

As the one kissed

but never wholly loved

words © Malai Carrara 2011

Photography copyright © Nausher Banaji

all rights retained by photographer